| Cauldy's Book List |
[Mar. 8th, 2019|01:48 pm] |
I've decided I'd like to build a reading list. Feel free to make suggestions -- but please remember I'm currently interested in non-fiction, with limited exceptions for classic fiction. I'll bold titles as I read them (they're in no particular order, though I did attempt to group them by theme). I starred the books that are particularly excellent (three stars for "absolutely must read"). Feel free to ask me about any of the bolded titles.
( Eventually I will read... ) |
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| Obligatory Crappy New Doll Photos |
[Jul. 7th, 2009|09:57 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | bjd | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  aggravated | ] |
I have a new doll, and thus I have taken the obligatory, totally crap first photos, which I have shooped the hell out of. She is a Rosette Good Afternoon Fir. I really, REALLY hate the lashes and am going to have to take them out and replace them with something less spidery. She also has several marks and scratches (shooped out) that resulted from her arriving with her faceplate totally detached from her head and just rolling around loose inside the box. Rosette is dragging their heels about getting back to me about a replacement, which is making me pretty irritated.
...otherwise, damn, I do love this doll. Her expression is so perfect. No name for the girl yet, though.
( Fear the Fir? Fier de la Fir? Fire and Fir? Feeeeh. ) |
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| Fiona Apple Again! |
[Apr. 10th, 2009|08:21 pm] |
I don't know if you were like me, and absolutely loved Fiona Apple back in the day -- that mellow, smoky voice that just rolls around you like velvet. It had something you don't hear a lot these days: soul. No bubblegum here, folks.
Well, she's recorded a new song (maybe it's not that new, but it's new to me at least!). Just close your eyes and listen to this one. It really transports you to another time, and another place. Just beautiful.
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| Cute Materialistic Stuff |
[Mar. 22nd, 2009|07:55 pm] |
Pro: I have been making an attempt not to buy new dolls or doll clothing, since I just purchased a large amount of Cheerydoll and Azone stuff not that long ago.
Con: I have been spending a lot of time browsing HLJ and finding cute things I'd like to buy. These are significantly less expensive that dolls and doll clothing, but significantly more useless -- just cute clutter.
So what do I want?
( Hidamari no Tami! )( Fraulein! )( Walkie Bits! )( Jellyfish Mood Lamp )( Inanimate Character Stickers )
Anyone have any other really cute, not-totally-but-rather-only-slightly useless things I should look at?
Also. Seriously. Fraulein? Do I get one? Halp! |
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| Frustrated and Ranting -- As Usual |
[Mar. 6th, 2009|12:34 am] |
I think my job is turning me into someone I don't want to be. I'm pretty sure 25 is too young to be burned-out, isn't it?
The busy season is just beginning to heat up, and it already feels like I'm drowning. I'm so much more negative and intolerant than I used to be; it seems like all I can do is complain and bitch and rant. I'm exhausted all the time. I'm exhausted when I wake up, I'm exhausted when I get to work, I'm exhausted when I get home, and I'm exhausted when I go to bed. Except I don't sleep; I've never had a problem sleeping before, but now I'm an insomniac. It's not just a physical exhaustion, it's this deep down to the bone exhaustion that clouds everything.
Ugh, and even now all I can do is complain. I wish I knew how to fix this. Maybe seeing Deneb this weekend will help cheer things up... and I hope Christina comes down during her Spring Break. I wonder if it's even worth trying to look for a new job in this economy. |
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| True Beauty -- True Idiocy |
[Feb. 16th, 2009|09:35 pm] |
True Beauty drives me absolutely crazy. I absolutely adore Julia. She's passed every single test with flying colors; she's never NOT helped someone (given, I missed one episode, so maybe she flubbed there, but in all the episodes I've seen, she's the only one who HASN'T fucked up on at least one of the judges' cheesy-ass "tests"). She is a nice girl. She is a sweet, honest, down-to-earth, NICE girl. And she is gorgeous. GORGEOUS. She has always been my #1 in terms of physical beauty. She's just so cute! I would bang her in a hot second, and I wouldn't let any of the other contestants touch me with even one of their sleazy fingers.
But everyone keeps calling her "fake," as if no one could possibly be THAT nice. It drives me crazy. When did nice = fake on a show that's supposed to be about inner beauty? I want to smash these judges in their 15-minutes-of-fame-is-over faces with a sledgehammer. The truth is, people can be THAT nice. Heather in high school really was THAT nice. I never heard her say a bad thing about anyone, even her cheating-ass boyfriend when their relationship crashed and burned in flames. Laura at college. Laura was pretty as a Barbie doll, blonde, blue-eyed, body to DIE for, rich, designer clothes, graceful, and the center of attention at all times. She could have been a total bitch-whore-diva from hell, but she was the sweetest, kindest little thing you ever did see in a children's book. She was THAT nice. So it makes me so angry when everyone keeps calling Julia fake because she's THAT nice. Dammit!
Also, could someone explain the deal with Laura? The judges keep talking about how pretty she is... maybe I'm wired wrong. She's... just okay. She's not someone who would make me look twice (now Julia, I'd look about 1,000 times). Laura is just so generic. There's nothing distinct or gorgeous about her, other than her eternal slutitude. Which, now that I think about it, isn't distinct or gorgeous either. It's justy generic slut. I feel like I've seen her in every porno every made. |
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| Difficult Difficult Difficult |
[Feb. 1st, 2009|06:50 pm] |
Rhone drives me batty. She's such a lovely doll... but she's not photogenic. At all. I don't know what it is, but she turns out terrible in photographs. I think these three portrait shots (two more behind the cut) managed to turn out all right, but in general, Rhone looks at least 4x better in real life than in photos.
( The other two... ) |
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| Is this my song? |
[Jan. 22nd, 2009|11:48 pm] |
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
( ... )
I'm about half-way through The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath.
Still on my book list are Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, and then Virginia Woolf's own A Room of One's Own, in addition to Where the Girls Are: Growing Up Female with the Mass Media and The Second Sex. Don't despair, though, my reading list isn't entirely feminist works: despite my hatred of John Steinbeck, I have The Grapes of Wrath on my list, as well as There Are No Children Here, The Hot Zone, and Bad Blood: The Tuskegee Syphilis Experiment.
It's strange, how my tastes have changed. I have trouble remembering the last sci-fi/fantasy book I read... perhaps Dead After Dark which, despite how much I like True Blood, was a bit of a disappointment. Maybe I'll read the next book in the series after the next season of True Blood is finished (Fall 2009?). I don't know what happened; I simply do not want to read about overcoming that Great Evil (TM) or meeting one's True Love (c). I can't believe it anymore; my mind screams "This isn't true, this is all false, all wrong!" with each page. I want truth. I want ugly, petty, unfair, tangled truth, with all its unhappy endings and unfinished stories.
Maybe it's because I think it -- and, perhaps, I -- won't be okay? |
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| ;_______________; |
[Jan. 14th, 2009|10:09 pm] |
IT'S SO COLD RIGHT NOW, THE SNOW IS WARMER THAN THE AIR.
Per the nightly news, a thermometer stuck in the snow in Madison reads 0°F.
A thermometer held up in the air reads -6°F.
SNOW SHOULD NEVER BE WARMER THAN SOMETHING ELSE.
SNOW SHOULD NEVER BE WARMER THAN ANYTHING ELSE.
It's so cold, that in the time it took me to hurry from the door to my car, my snot froze.
My snot froze. While it was still INSIDE MY NOSE.
OHMYGODSOMEONEPLZSAVEMENAO. PLZ. PLZ. PLLLLLZ. |
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| BOOBS! ---> ( . )( . ) |
[Jan. 13th, 2009|12:57 am] |
I keep waking up topless.
...
....
.....
......
.......
Did that get your attention? I hope so. Because it's true. I go to bed with a shirt on. I wake up without a shirt on.
I have no idea what's going on here. Since it's winter, I'm wearing long-sleeved shirts, usually with cuffs at the wrists and small collars. These are not exactly tube tops you can accidentally squirm out of while sleeping. It takes a definite, conscious action to remove these shirts. Besides, it's not like I'm waking up with my shirt tangled up with the covers, or fallen on the side of my bed. Oh, no, that would be too normal. I wake up with my shirt hanging out on the other side of my bedroom.
The thing is, I have no memory of taking my shirt off, either. First, I'm the type of person who remembers waking up to take a sip of water, or put on chapstick, or lotion my hands, or even re-adjust my pillows. It seems pretty illogical that I'd remember re-adjusting my pillows, but not taking off my shirt. Second, I have no history of sleep-walking, sleep-talking, sleep-eating, sleep-anything. I pretty much lie like a rock when I'm asleep. I don't really thrash or roll about; I wake up on the same side of the bed that I fell asleep on.
What the hell is going on? |
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| True Beauty: Ep 2 (Who are these judges?) |
[Jan. 12th, 2009|10:29 pm] |
So there was a lot of forced drama which was pointless and boring (bad! reality tv should NOT BE BORING!), and CJ had no shoes but wasn't eliminated, and Ashley looked like Ashley Simpson and was sent home, and everyone hates Chelsea even though she hasn't done anything all that heinous (other than her daily make-up job, which is a true crime), Billy is orange and likes protein shakes, and... OH GOD, WHAT ARE THOSE MONSTERS?! THE JUDGES ARE HIDEOUS!
That's all I can really say. I tried to talk about it, but words fail. I'm not sure I can keep reviewing episodes. The judges are so much worse than any of the contestants... I feel like the contestants should be giving them fashion (and acting) tips. |
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| True Beauty: Ep 1 (Who are these people?) |
[Jan. 5th, 2009|09:59 pm] |
HAHAHAHA I'M COPYING YOU ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) hooveraardvark! I SHALL STEAL ALL YOUR BRILLIANT IDEAS!
Actually... there's just something about the Tyra shows that demand review. Maybe it's the sheer ridiculousness of it all? There's always something so cheesy about them, but it's an entertaining kind of cheesy...
tl;dr - For a show named "True Beauty," these people are shockingly ugly. Also, is ABC a racist (or am I one)?
( On to the reviews! )
Also, the website for "True Beauty" is COATED in ads for weight-loss gimmicks. BLOLOLOLOLOL. |
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| Epic FAIL |
[Jan. 2nd, 2009|06:59 pm] |
tl;dr -- I apply for a new job. They want me to take 20 hours worth of vacation, a QUARTER of my YEARLY VACATION ALLOTMENT, over the course of 3 interviews for a job I'm not guaranteed to get. I tell them to shove it!
( Epic FAIL in DETAIL ) |
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| Touch of Summer Sunshine |
[Dec. 20th, 2008|05:58 pm] |
Today it snowed.
And snowed.
And snowed.
Grey skies, white snow, grey streets, white yards... Mimosa just wouldn't have it!
So she brought her own sunshine.
( Queen of SunnyD ) |
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| This is public, just to annoy you. |
[Dec. 9th, 2008|12:28 am] |
Okay, there were a lot of things that annoyed me about Vegas, but one of them had nothing to do with the city itself.
Bunny's head whipping around like weather vane in a cyclone, back and forth, back and forth, like he was being worried by a jack russell fucking terrier with ADHD, while I tried to watch the Viva Vision show on Fremont Street. Look, I know you have no interest in the trippy music videos playing overhead. Feign interest for five goddamn minutes, or at least leave me alone so I can enjoy the show, because I actually like it.
Bunny walking past a neon sign with "The Venetian," opening doors with large V's on them, walking past another sign reading "Venetian," and then asking me what casino we were in. Uh, it's decorated like Italy, hmmm, maybe it's Circus Circus? Or the Sahara?
Bunny commenting that he thought the Wynn Las Vegas was really "old." Really? You mean the newest megaresort on the Strip, that opened in 2005, seems "old"? Oh, wait, I'm sorry. I forgot you're so inexperienced that you can't tell the difference between "luxurious" and "old." It can't be that you're older than me. Surely I'm not your girlfriend. I'm your babysitter, right?
Bunny, after I had said directly to him that he was supposed to comfort me and calm me down, shrugging and saying "Meh, Bunny's just quiet." Thanks, asshole. I was having a panic attack. Which you made me deal with on my own. While I was driving unfamiliar, winding roads. Panic attack. Very romantic.
Bunny not buying me a single thing (for my, uh, birthday) even though I brought him a present (Runaway Bunny boxed set, book & little stuffed rabbit, $25). Yes, you heard me. For my birthday, I bought someone else a present, and he got me ZIP. Even though there were plenty of occasions -- my KÀ program ($15), the Cirque du Soleil canvas bag I was admiring ($20), the Cirque du Soleil purse I spent like 20 minutes looking at ($64), the jewelry I was looking at the Lost City Museum ($10-$30), the bubble bath I wanted at Bath & Body Works ($10), the stuffed sheep I wanted at Bath & Body Works ($6 for 2), etc. -- I didn't get a single present. I ended up buying myself half the things I wanted (KÀ program, CdS purse, bubble bath). Happy birthday to me!
Bunny being such a downer after the KÀ show. In all honesty, I regret asking for my dad to pay for his tickets. They were $125 a pop (plus a $4 processing fee each) and Bunny did NOT deserve it. He barely appreciated the show (cretin!), and when we came out and I was excited and bouncy about it, he was a fucking leaden weight. I'm sitting here being all excited and happy and using words like "awesome" and "amazing" and "breathtaking" and "incredble," and he shrugs and says it was "pretty good" in a leaden voice. You do not deserve theatre, you pissant.
Bunny, after I had complained numerous times about how hard it was to drive in the rain, asking me if I wanted to take a "scenic drive" while it was fucking pouring (note: I was the only driver on the rental agreement, since Bunny's driving terrifies me -- which meant, for a "scenic drive," I would have to drive). Seriously, were you listening to me at all? I don't like driving in the rain, so you're suggesting I... drive in the rain?
All in all, it was like Bunny had "checked out" -- emotionally, psychologically, and mentally, he just wasn't there. He never got excited about anything. It was as if "glee" were some foreign concept he'd never run into and couldn't process. Every time I got really happy at something, he downplayed it, as if my joy were somehow a bad or inappropriate thing that had to be stopped. He wasn't sensitive about anything -- yes, I was really cranky and bitchy the first two days, and was meaner to you than I should have been, but this was my vacation and it was pouring, and you didn't need to act like a 12-year-old boy and take it personally -- and didn't pick up on any hints. Not to mention that, yes, I'm incredibly pissed that I was having a full-blown panic attack and it felt like my heart was imploding, and he just shrugged at me when I directly asked him for help. Cannot. Emphasize. How. Very. Very. Pissed. I. Am. Panic attack. Seriously. P-a-n-i-c A-t-t-a-c-k.
And he was just... dumb. Even though I read my guidebook on the plane, and he'd told me he'd read his significantly in advance, he couldn't work out whether a particular megaresort was in the northern, middle, or southern portion of the Strip. He'd look at a sign that said "Silverado Ranch Boulevard" and then read out loud "Silver Gate Road." He seemed to be totally ignorant of things I would call "common sense" -- he'd say something like "If the restaurant was that busy on Thursday night, it must be really crazy on the weekends," nevermind that particular Thursday was, uh, Thanksgiving in a major tourist destination and not at all representative of an average Thursday. Or he'd say something like "I can't believe traffic was that insane on a Wednesday afternoon," except of course, it was the Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving and we were driving within blocks of the city's main airport, and traffic near any airport on the day before a major holiday is always insane.
Lastly, he's really cynical -- but it's like a totally faux-cynicism, not the deep and sort of wise cynicism that comes from being jaded by the world, but the teenage cynicism that comes from reading about shit on the internet. I'm sorry. You can read all you want about something, but unless you experience it, you'll never really know it. A person could spend their whole life reading about Paris, but unless they actually visit the city, I'll know the "essence" of Paris way better than they ever could because I experienced it, I lived there, I breathed it, ate it, walked it, got it under my skin and in my blood. He seemed so sheltered and young to me, and it made me feel old, kind of like I was holding a child's hand, or being a babysitter or a teacher. I want a relationship with an equal, not with someone who makes me feel like the "experienced one." Bunny, seriously, give up your paranoia and your narcissism, and LIVE. Get out of your comfort zone, which it seems you've never even tried to leave, and GET DOWN AND DIRTY WITH LIFE. Despite all this shit, we could still be friends, but unless you backpack across Tibet or something, we could never be lovers.
So yeah, I'm single now. Single.
And seriously considering trying to be a lesbian, as opposed to bisexual (I know you can't really choose your sexuality and it's biological, and I can't force myself to not be turned on by attractive guys, but I can actively choose to not date men). I am just having shit luck with men, they all feel mentally so very young, naive, and inexperienced to me. Mom says I just need to give up and, like, date a guy in the 35-45 range (I'm 25). I dunno. Suggestions? |
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